Refuge from Spousal Abuse in Faith Communities

“We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system and thereby become a participant in its evil.”- Dr.Martin Luther King, Jr.

Everyday spouses around the world are abused. One of the places where one could go to find comfort unfortunately becomes the place where more abuse occurs. What do I mean?

There is a lack of spousal abuse awareness and abuse training in church communities.

When an abused spouse asks for help from their Church they are told” the bible says submit to your husband”.

For example, there was a young couple that went to a minister for help. The husband verbally abused his wife. The wife told the minister about her fear of her husband’s rage and degrading remarks. This minister told the wife that maybe she is not submitting to her husband as the bible says. So the wife stayed in the relationship and endured more abuse. Finally, the wife got the strength to leave her marriage. She also left the church.

What’s wrong with this picture?

The abuser is protected while the victim feels alienated.

Sadly, this is a common story. More often than not, the wife stays in the relationship and convinces herself to “bear her cross for Christ.” Even if her spirit is being trampled under the feet of her husband, she stays.

As uncomfortable as this topic is in our society, it must be addressed. There are programs that train clergy members about spousal abuse support and counseling.

By participating in training, churches will be better equipped to handle the crying hearts of spouses in their congregations.

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Yukio Phillips

Author: admin

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