I’m not a doctor, I’m writing this article to share for purposes of encouragement, support, and genuine love for helping others through tough times. Whether male or female, we’re human and we have issues with our bodies or we’re faced with dealing with issues other family members, friends, and loved ones have with their bodies. We’re born and we’ll be out of here someday, along the way we need help.
Cancer problems and emotional trauma over cancer are not new to me. My grandmothers both had Cancer. I watched them suffer. My husband’s prostate Cancer was a shock but thank-God, with different results.
When Gary was at work he worked hard. Some would say he had the managerial case of workaholism. He didn’t want to go to a doctor, but he was having some difficult with sexual performance. His body wasn’t cooperating with his mind. He wanted more and his body was reacting less. This is not going to be an x-rated article. It’s very clean. I just want to be clear.
He told his boss about not having the results he wanted with his body and how he felt frustrated. His boss kept telling him to see a doctor, don’t let it go, don’t make light of this. Deal with it. Get an examination and ask for help.
Finally, Gary went to the doctor and was told he had Prostate Cancer. He denied the diagnosis until he finally sought the best medical doctor he could be recommended to in the field. He ultimately had the prostate removed in a procedure that did not damage the nerves so that he would has the best possible chance of resuming sexual activity with some time.
First, there’s definitely different experiences to understand after the removal of the prostate. When a man ejaculates, there’s no fluids coming out. No messy sheets or partners, yet it feels good. That’s different. How does a man emotionally feel about not having the fluids shoot out? It takes adjustment and since that’s not coming back, he has to adjust to the physical difference, if he wants to recover better emotionally.
What happens when the desire for sexual experiences exist after the surgery and the body is not ready to cooperate with the mind, what can you do to help. A partner should be positively supportive of the desires. Sometimes, men will seek out equipment to aid with sexual processes and functions and these devices can be expensive and sometimes cause more frustration than they are worth.
For couples, it can be so helpful to find as many other loving things to do to each other, in addition to the concept of intercourse. There’s so much more to explore in the areas of sensuality and gratification of the senses. They are worth exploring.
Find other ways of enjoyment for each other whether it’s the adult-type movies, massage, and other fun activities. Talk about your issues and concerns and ask questions of professionals as much as you need or want help.
Another embarrassing sexual issue for a Prostate Cancer patient is following the removal of the prostate, there tends to be more urine leakage and that’s not always something which can be controlled so be prepared with extra underwear and paper towels around the house to ease embarrassment. It’s also great to take a change of pants to keep in the trunk of the car if you feel you need to change.
There’s no magical date that you can declare for when your body will return to normal functioning after the prostate has been removed, but Gary was told to expect about 3 years and that was accurate for him. At first, nighttime relations after working all day were not the best time of day for us, morning was best. With a little more time, day or night became the same and we’re much happier and very thankful for having each other, being patient and loving, and for always believing we’d experience loving like before the surgery.
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