Why Smart People Sometimes Have Poor Social Skills


Do you ever have trouble making conversation with others even though you consider yourself to be an intelligent person?

If so, this may puzzle you. You may wonder why you are so poor at making conversation with others, even though you are very smart, and know a lot of interesting things.

The truth is that many average people with average intelligence and average interests are much better at making small talk and have better social skills than people who are very intelligent.

And many people who are very intelligent are extremely poor at making small talk conversation and may have poor social skills.

Why should this be?

Here are some of the reasons why very intelligent, very creative people often have difficulty in making small talk conversation successfully:

1.) They may be perfectionists. These people may have very high expectations of themselves about everything they do. When they think they have failed at anything, they judge themselves very harshly. If they think they are failing at small talk, they just get even more nervous and tongue tied. Their harsh selfjudgment makes them so anxious that they can not relax and simply enjoy being with other people.

2.) People who are very smart may have sent most of their life trying to become very intellectually developed, but sometimes they neglect to develop their social and emotional side. They may feel that developing their social and emotional side is not very important, or they may feel that it is too late to try learn these new skills.

3.) They may be very serious people and believe that they should only spend their time thinking about serious matters and talking about serious matters. They may believe that talking about unimportant things is a waste of time. This makes them get bored very quickly with small talk that does not seem to lead anywhere.

4.) In some cases, people who are smarter than average actually feel superior to others and believe they should not have to waste their time with average people having average conversations. They may really really be snobs at heart.

5.) Many very intelligent people suffer from extreme shyness or from poor self esteem. This may cause them to feel that they have nothing interesting or worthwhile to contribute to a conversation.

6.) Some very intelligent people, particularly those who are strong in scientific and mathematical skills may have a condition called Asperger's syndrome. This condition which is believed to be related to autism, shows itself in many different ways. Often, the person who has some degree of Asperger's is extremely good at focusing on a scientific topic, but is unable to understand the kinds of social interactions that most other people take for granted. People with Asperger's may talk in a rigid, mechanical way, and be uninterested in other people's emotional lives.

No matter how intelligent a person is, a lack of social skills can hold them back in their social life and their career.

So if you are one of those people who is quite smart, but has problems with social skills and with making small talk, what should you do?


First, you must ask yourself whether improving your social skills is something that you really want to do.

If the answer is truly no, then you do not need to work on trying to improve this particular talent.

However, if the answer is yes, the good news is that you really can improve your conversational skills and your ability to enjoy small talk, and have enjoyable social relationships with others.

However, you will need to make a real commitment to improving your skills in this area, and you will have to practice talking with others and making friends.

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Author: admin

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